Broken Church

RECENTLY I tweeted:

What is church? It’s people, broken people … pretending not to be broken … and that’s what breaks it…

… but things, maybe people too, are easily lost in the twittersphere, so I thought I’d say it again here.

I find church difficult: I love the fellowship, the shared communion, the sense (sometimes!) of common purpose, of being on a journey together; but then we get to the Bible readings, creeds, hymns, liturgy, prayers … and inside of me, just beneath the surface, there’s a voice screaming, “It’s not real!”

Or is it? Is there, somewhere amongst all the hype about God almighty, something real? Something deeper, something … transcendent?

People — myself included — talk about mission, evangelism, good news. But what’s good about believing fantasy? On what basis are we, is anyone, expected to invite people to become part of a community that so often can’t even see its own brokenness? What’s the good of lighting candles only to snuff them out? What’s the good of faking it for Jesus when Jesus reserved his harshest words for fakers?

And Jesus himself? Where are you, Jesus? Would we recognise you if you came to one of our services? Would you recognise our church services, meetings, fellowship groups — whatever we want to call them — as having anything to do with you?

Or would we find you sitting on the wall outside, having a smoke, broke and broken and wondering what it’s all about?